Most people try to live a good life in their own strength. They attempt to live a life of righteousness & display the fruits of the Spirit without the actual help of the Spirit. They are called "fruits of the Spirit" for a reason. True love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, self-control can only come from a life in the Spirit.
The key is not focusing on the fruits, but focusing on staying plugged into the Vine. Jesus said in John 15 that if you abide (remain) in Him, He will remain in you & you will bear much fruit. However, if you do not remain in Him & abide in His love, you will be cut off.
Jesus said if we love Him, to obey His commandments (John 14:15). We cannot live a life of sin & expect to be abiding in His love. However, sometimes we are not living in sin & still cannot hear Him or feel Him. It is in those moments that we BELIEVE Him & what He said concerning His love for us. He will never leave us or forsake us, & He will reward those who diligently seek Him (Rom. 8:37-39; Heb. 13:5). He will come to us & visit us.
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